when elvis met nixon...and kristen had her camera-phone

does mcdonalds still put mini job applications on their dine-in trays?

internship's over. i've been back that in my old department for three weeks now. 6 years, 2 promotions, three departments later, i'm back at square one. seems all the rungs i've jumped to on the corporate ladder have been termite infested and have given way. maybe i actually found chutes disguised as ladders.








so i don't have time to photoshop as much anymore, i thought i'd share some other stuff i did for the the macauley's new years, for those of you who were unable to attend or were otherwise engaged. how about this next new years, we ALL pool our collective ideas into one gigunda-snatch-a-riffic-flippity-bing-bang-sippy-taw-on-the-dimmy-sigh party. and lets have it mostly coordinated by september 30th at the very latest. we can have monthly progress meetings. i'll sign up to bring ham salad and roman meal split butter top whole wheat bread. unless you're offended that the romans killed jesus. then in that case, you bring the bread. or not. ham salad's just as dee-lishus by the spoonful.

if only the network had picked up my failed sci-fi pilot

or if i had completed my training at the powerplant pro wrestling academy


or went to clown college

or used a growth disorder as a tool to achieve stardom


or devoted my spare time to community theatre

why i shouldn't have a mophead emo-kid haircut

alternate title: no one ever respects the pretty-boy martial artist.
2nd runner-up: umm...are those dildos? well, that's...interesting....is that also crafters twine??

the birth of l'il kristen bloeser